We Must Stop This Now!

THIS IS HAPPENING RIGHT HERE IN OUR OWN COUNTRY!
We Must Stop This  Immediately

Have you noticed that stairs are  getting steeper.  Groceries are heavier.   And, everything  is farther away.  Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was  dumbfounded to discover  how long our street had  become!

And, you know, people are less  considerate now, especially the young  ones. They speak  in whispers all  the time!  If you ask them to speak up they just  keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the  same silent  message until they’re red in the face!  What do they think  I am, a lip reader?

I  also think they are much younger than I was at the same  age.  On the other hand, people my own age are so  much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and  she has aged so much that she didn’t even  recognize me.


I  got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing  my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own reflection well, REALLY NOW - even mirrors are not  made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days!   You’re risking life and limb if you happen to pull  onto the motor way in front of them.  All I can say  is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I  see them screech and swerve in my rear view  mirror.

Clothing manufacturers  are less  civilized these days.  Why else would they suddenly start  labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20?  Do they think no one notices? The people who make bathroom  scales are pulling the same prank.   Do they think I actually ‘believe’ the number I  see on that dial?  HA!  I would never let  myself weigh that much!  Just who do these people  think they’re  fooling?

I’d  like to call up someone in authority to report what’s  going on — but the telephone company is  in on the conspiracy too: they’ve printed the phone  books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in  there!

All I can do is  pass along this  warning:

WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!

Unless something  drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to  suffer these awful  indignities.


PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE  YOU KNOW AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO WE CAN GET THIS  CONSPIRACY  STOPPED!

PS: I am sending  this to you in a larger font size, because something has  happened to my computer’s fonts – they are smaller than  they once were.

Tags:

Comments are closed.